Oyster but definietly no pearls

Only 31 days 10 hours and 29 mins. Well that plus 1 e-mail (ignored) and 2 phone calls.
That's the effort required to sort the fair fare, without fanfare, for one tube journey.
First phone call went moderately well. Only 5 different menus to talk to a nice lady at transport for London. It would of been preferable to speak to someone who could speak English, but we can't be fussy in this day and age. Result : failed.
Second phone call took 30 mins, luckily English speaker. Unluckily moron. I had to explain how the Oyster card adds and subtracts fares for him. He has one role in life, and its all too much. Result : pending.

How do you go about hiring such people.
Duties speaking to public on the phone to resolve issues.
Language: Any
Reasoning capability: Optional
I suppose they just use the timeless classic -"we are an equal opportunities employer"

In red ken's socialist utopia this is the future. Lack of ability should be no bar to anyone pursuing the job of there dreams.

I would leave the country but they have even taxed that.

UPDATE: Dim, but nice actually succeed

Tamper with your balls.

Akhtar and Asif do drugs.
Drugs is naughty and not allowed by ICC.
Akhtar and Asif get caught doing drugs.
ICC applys the rules of Cricket.
Akhtar and Asif continue to play Test Cricket.

Darrell Hair applys the rules of Cricket.
Darrell Hair reserve umpire for Kenya v scotland.

There's a moral somewhere. Can you find it?

Peerages for sale (wot about Londoners)

So a member of the Labour hierarchy gets collared by Bill. The rest of the great and the good then criticize said Bill for daring to conduct such an act. Unfortunately when ministers present new bills to parliament, all of a sudden Bill is Gods' representatives on Earth and every civil liberty should be axed at their alter.
Eventually the decision to prosecute will appear on attorney generals desk. I wonder if the "national interest" will be considered again?

Shoulder Chip

Why should I pay £131.50 per annum to listen to adverts for Ch4 Big Brother programme, which costs me nothing to watch.
Why is an annual licence not annual but 11 months plus remainder of the month when you first buy it. With computers now days it can't be difficult to just add 365.25 days to the date of purchase.
Why is the Government so interested in passing a Broadcasting Act, less than three years after the second world war, while rationing is still happening?

I'll tell you why. They are out to fuck you.